1 00:00:12,721 --> 00:00:15,765 What up, y'all? It's your girl Sasha here, with my girl, Zia. 2 00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,517 And we're the first to get our hands 3 00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:20,478 on Bay Cosmetics' unreleased new exfoliating lip gloss. 4 00:00:20,562 --> 00:00:24,399 - Mmm-hmm. We're on some next-level... - Shh! 5 00:00:24,482 --> 00:00:26,026 Our dads are watching! 6 00:00:26,109 --> 00:00:27,109 Oh. 7 00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:29,029 - Okay. - Okay, so... 8 00:00:29,112 --> 00:00:30,739 - [Sasha] Mmm-hmm. - [Zia] Mmm-mmm. 9 00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:31,948 - Blot. - Mmm... 10 00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:33,450 - Good? Yeah? - Okay, yes. 11 00:00:33,533 --> 00:00:36,036 Now, tell me your first impressions, Zia. 12 00:00:36,119 --> 00:00:39,706 Well, when I first met you, I thought you were a little stuck-up. 13 00:00:39,789 --> 00:00:42,000 - Always on... - Can we stick to the lip gloss? 14 00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:43,710 Oh, right. Gotcha. Okay. [clears throat] 15 00:00:43,793 --> 00:00:46,504 - Well, this is a great color. You know? - Oh, love it. 16 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:49,132 I mean, it goes with everything. Not sticky at all. 17 00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:51,593 Has a little bit of a tingle, but that's okay. 18 00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:53,344 People like a little tingle. 19 00:00:53,428 --> 00:00:56,181 [chuckling] I know I do. 20 00:00:56,264 --> 00:00:58,975 - Okay, it's a little more than a tingle. - More than a tingle? 21 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:00,977 It kinda feels like a Flamin' Hot Cheeto! 22 00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:02,312 I like Hot Cheetos. 23 00:01:02,395 --> 00:01:04,773 Okay, something's not right! My lips are on fire! 24 00:01:05,690 --> 00:01:06,524 Hell, yes, girl! 25 00:01:06,608 --> 00:01:09,486 I told you you were gonna look smoke and fire. 26 00:01:09,569 --> 00:01:11,321 And your lips could be fire, too. 27 00:01:11,404 --> 00:01:13,698 All you need to do is go to the Bay Cosmetics website 28 00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:15,033 to pre-order yours today. 29 00:01:15,116 --> 00:01:17,660 And make sure to use the promo code "bad biotch." 30 00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:19,454 No, biotch! Something's not right! 31 00:01:19,537 --> 00:01:21,456 My lips, they're melting off my face! 32 00:01:21,539 --> 00:01:22,725 - They're melting off... - Yes! 33 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:24,834 - Help! Help! - I don't... What do you mean... 34 00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:26,753 Don't worry, baby! Daddy's here! 35 00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:33,885 So, you know, 36 00:01:33,968 --> 00:01:37,055 like, comment, subscribe. 37 00:01:41,559 --> 00:01:44,604 ♪ We can laugh, we can hang But don't embarrass me ♪ 38 00:01:44,687 --> 00:01:47,941 ♪ Please don't say the wrong thing, Dad Don't embarrass me again ♪ 39 00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:50,610 ♪ We can dance, we can joke But don't embarrass me ♪ 40 00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:53,696 ♪ Don't embarrass me Please, Dad, don't embarrass me ♪ 41 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:56,658 ♪ I know that you mean well But don't be so foul ♪ 42 00:01:56,741 --> 00:01:59,828 ♪ When I'm hanging with my friends Please don't be acting wild ♪ 43 00:02:01,663 --> 00:02:04,415 Stace. Stace, stop pacing. Stop pacing. 44 00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:07,001 I knew I shouldn't have got you that Fitbit for Christmas. 45 00:02:07,085 --> 00:02:09,546 The stress is helping me get my steps in. I'm at 15,000. 46 00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:12,048 Okay, yeah... Well, okay. Great. Listen. 47 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:14,300 Are you on the phone with the German manufacturers? 48 00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:15,844 Yeah, what's taking so long? 49 00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:18,263 We cannot put out this new lip gloss until this gets fixed. 50 00:02:18,346 --> 00:02:20,265 Oh, "we"? We're not "we." 51 00:02:20,348 --> 00:02:22,851 You quit Coke, came to work here for a day, 52 00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:24,102 then joined Pepsi. 53 00:02:24,185 --> 00:02:27,272 You ain't loyal and you got high sodium levels. 54 00:02:28,356 --> 00:02:29,607 I am very loyal. 55 00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:32,944 Okay, I know this is Mom's company, but Mama didn't raise no fool. 56 00:02:33,027 --> 00:02:34,027 Pepsi doubled my salary. 57 00:02:34,070 --> 00:02:37,282 Well, let's just see if Pepsi invites you to Thanksgiving. 58 00:02:39,576 --> 00:02:40,577 Damn, you still on hold? 59 00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:41,661 Yeah. It's not so bad. 60 00:02:41,744 --> 00:02:43,872 They're playing "I Can't Feel My Face" in German. 61 00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:45,456 Sounds a lot angrier, though. 62 00:02:46,791 --> 00:02:47,959 Sash, how's Zia doing? 63 00:02:48,042 --> 00:02:49,919 She's okay. Her lips are healing. 64 00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:52,797 Here, I took a picture. The swelling's gone way down. 65 00:02:53,381 --> 00:02:54,549 - Oh! - [Stacy exclaiming] 66 00:02:54,632 --> 00:02:56,718 - Damn. Lord, have mercy. - [Stacy] Oh, my God! 67 00:02:56,801 --> 00:02:59,220 Oh, she look like a bigmouth bass. 68 00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:02,098 Shut up, Brian. 69 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:04,601 But I guess it's safe to say she's hooked on Bay. 70 00:03:05,351 --> 00:03:07,520 [laughing] Too soon, too soon. 71 00:03:08,104 --> 00:03:09,272 Yeah, too soon. 72 00:03:09,355 --> 00:03:12,483 I mean, our video already has 200,000 views. 73 00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:13,567 Oh, my God. 74 00:03:14,319 --> 00:03:16,654 Zia's lips ain't the only thing blowing up. 75 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:20,200 Look, I got a feeling all of this is gonna blow over. 76 00:03:20,283 --> 00:03:22,827 No, this could affect our sales across the board. 77 00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:25,455 #Baysucks is trending number one on all platforms. 78 00:03:25,538 --> 00:03:27,540 We're even on the home page of LinkedIn. 79 00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:30,752 This is a hell of a first week to be the head of marketing. 80 00:03:30,835 --> 00:03:33,213 Look, we just gotta stay calm, cool and collected, 81 00:03:33,296 --> 00:03:34,589 like Denzel in all his movies. 82 00:03:34,672 --> 00:03:39,969 All right. Okay. All right. Okay. All right. All right, okay. 83 00:03:40,553 --> 00:03:41,596 Uh, yes, hello. 84 00:03:41,679 --> 00:03:44,807 Okay, Denzel, say, "All right, okay." It's the factory in Düsseldorf. 85 00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:48,061 I'm about to go Christoph Waltz on they ass. 86 00:03:48,144 --> 00:03:49,562 Guten Tag. 87 00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:53,524 - [Brian continues indistinctly] - I can't believe this. 88 00:03:53,608 --> 00:03:55,026 You know, I'm so overwhelmed 89 00:03:55,109 --> 00:03:58,571 because all we were trying to do was just promote Bay on our IG Live. 90 00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:01,908 Oh, sweetheart, it is not your fault. 91 00:04:01,991 --> 00:04:04,285 Or Zia's. Blame Johnny's genetics. 92 00:04:05,536 --> 00:04:07,747 Seriously? [scoffs] 93 00:04:07,830 --> 00:04:08,915 Leave me alone. 94 00:04:09,540 --> 00:04:10,416 Blocked. 95 00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:12,144 What? Who are you blocking? What's going on? 96 00:04:12,168 --> 00:04:15,046 Since that video dropped, I've been dealing with a bully. 97 00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:17,257 They keep telling me to set myself on fire. 98 00:04:17,340 --> 00:04:19,175 What? Who's bullying my niece? 99 00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:20,802 I will cut that little bitch! 100 00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:24,138 Which refers to him, her or they. [chuckles nervously] 101 00:04:25,473 --> 00:04:27,976 Oh, my gosh. Bullies are the worst. I'm so sorry. 102 00:04:28,059 --> 00:04:32,188 I remember my bully from high school. What a horrible individual. 103 00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:35,816 Hey, Robert. 104 00:04:35,858 --> 00:04:37,068 Hey, Chelsea. 105 00:04:37,151 --> 00:04:38,987 Uh, I did your homework, like you asked. 106 00:04:39,070 --> 00:04:41,739 Good. You know what's better than doing my homework? 107 00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:43,908 That Jordan. What size you wear? 108 00:04:45,159 --> 00:04:46,286 - Six. - Perfect! 109 00:04:48,579 --> 00:04:51,499 Bring me the other one tomorrow, or I'll break your other foot. 110 00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:56,462 Bullies ain't shit. 111 00:04:57,547 --> 00:04:59,507 I'm just not sure how to handle it. 112 00:04:59,590 --> 00:05:00,800 What do you think, Stacy? 113 00:05:00,883 --> 00:05:04,387 Well, I would just have an honest conversation with this person 114 00:05:04,470 --> 00:05:06,180 about how it's making you feel. 115 00:05:06,264 --> 00:05:08,850 Or do like I did and just eat your lunch in the bathroom. 116 00:05:11,519 --> 00:05:13,396 [scoffs] What happened to your bully? 117 00:05:13,479 --> 00:05:14,479 [sighs] 118 00:05:16,357 --> 00:05:17,650 Hey, Chelsea. 119 00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,444 My mama said I should talk to you. 120 00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:23,573 I really need my Jordans back. 121 00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:25,575 I don't know about your Jordans. 122 00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:27,285 I'm wearing my Jordans. 123 00:05:27,368 --> 00:05:28,828 And tell your punk-ass mama 124 00:05:28,911 --> 00:05:31,080 to make those tuna sandwiches I like tomorrow. 125 00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:33,374 No crusts, and there better be Fritos, fool. 126 00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:35,835 [Chelsea laughing] 127 00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:41,507 God, I miss high school. 128 00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:44,051 Do we have any Fritos? 129 00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:48,264 - Thank you, guys, for the advice. - Yeah. 130 00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:50,308 But can you please not say anything to my dad? 131 00:05:50,391 --> 00:05:52,268 You know how he can overreact to everything. 132 00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:53,392 [Brian] And another thing. 133 00:05:53,436 --> 00:05:55,355 I'm never watching Inglourious Basterds again. 134 00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:00,818 Brian! That was my phone! 135 00:06:00,902 --> 00:06:03,654 See? They messed up the ingredients in the lip gloss, 136 00:06:03,738 --> 00:06:05,198 and then they messed your phone up. 137 00:06:05,281 --> 00:06:06,281 Yeah, okay. 138 00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:11,662 Get with me, just like this. Here we go. 139 00:06:11,746 --> 00:06:15,666 Get ready. Over here, over there, in the air, crack it. 140 00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:17,293 - [exclaims] - [Sash sighs] 141 00:06:17,877 --> 00:06:18,877 Why are we doing this? 142 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:21,214 Because we are the Dixons. We're the Dixon family. 143 00:06:21,297 --> 00:06:22,632 That's all we do, is fight. 144 00:06:22,715 --> 00:06:23,883 We're known for that. 145 00:06:23,966 --> 00:06:25,760 Not only that, we live in Atlanta, 146 00:06:25,843 --> 00:06:27,678 and it's home of the Waffle House brawls. 147 00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:30,598 Somebody drop their sausage on your foot, you got to get at it. 148 00:06:32,475 --> 00:06:34,102 Okay, well, maybe you forgot, 149 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:36,145 but I spent a lot of time with my grandparents 150 00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:37,563 in Chiraq, Killinois. 151 00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:40,358 Your grandparents would sleep at 6:30 in the afternoon. 152 00:06:41,109 --> 00:06:43,528 Not only that, the only gun you saw was a Super Soaker. 153 00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:45,570 All right, now come on. 154 00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:47,508 What'll you do when somebody runs up on you? Huh? 155 00:06:47,532 --> 00:06:48,533 Call Zia. 156 00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:52,245 Call Zia for what? So she can dumb everything down? 157 00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:54,497 Come on, hit me right in the hands. 158 00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:55,706 That ain't my hand! 159 00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:57,625 That ain't my hands! 160 00:06:58,292 --> 00:06:59,710 Ah! That's a good one, though. 161 00:06:59,794 --> 00:07:01,587 I gotta put some ice on my umbilical cord. 162 00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:03,089 [breathing heavily] 163 00:07:03,673 --> 00:07:06,884 I tell you what, girl, that bully ain't got nothing on you. 164 00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:08,761 How did you know I had a bully? 165 00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:10,847 Your daddy knows everything, baby. 166 00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:12,432 Plus, I got eyes in the back of my... 167 00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:13,891 Stacy told you, didn't she? 168 00:07:13,975 --> 00:07:16,686 Yeah, that's right. That's right, she did. You know what? 169 00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:19,313 It doesn't matter, though, because everybody got bullies, okay? 170 00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:21,566 When I was growing up, I didn't have no bullies... 171 00:07:21,649 --> 00:07:24,318 That ain't the way I remember it. Tell her about Keith Henderson. 172 00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:26,904 Wait, what! Where? Keith! 173 00:07:28,322 --> 00:07:30,992 That boy, Keith Henderson, was a bad mother... 174 00:07:31,075 --> 00:07:34,036 Shut your mouth! He was a grown-ass man. 175 00:07:35,413 --> 00:07:37,748 Keith Henderson tried to whoop everybody's ass. 176 00:07:37,832 --> 00:07:40,543 He almost whooped my ass, and he was in eighth grade. 177 00:07:40,626 --> 00:07:43,004 - But you know, I got that clack-clack! - Uh-huh. 178 00:07:44,630 --> 00:07:47,091 No, I don't think you understand. He was a grown-ass man. 179 00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:49,385 He was the only kid in the whole of middle school 180 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:50,553 going through a divorce. 181 00:07:50,636 --> 00:07:53,222 He got even meaner when he lost custody. 182 00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:54,515 [chuckles] 183 00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:57,268 Wait, wait. Who is Keith Henderson? 184 00:07:57,351 --> 00:07:59,770 Make it stop! Make it stop! 185 00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:00,854 [whimpering] 186 00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:03,441 You know how many honeys will be at the game? 187 00:08:03,524 --> 00:08:04,567 That's what I'm saying. 188 00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:07,403 You get to your spot, we definitely going to the championship. 189 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,739 - Then we celebrating. - What! 190 00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:15,077 Yo, Dixon. Nice chain. Let me wear that. 191 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:16,454 No, man. Stall me out. 192 00:08:16,537 --> 00:08:17,580 Yeah, leave him alone. 193 00:08:17,663 --> 00:08:20,249 Are you putting your nose in this? Give me your chain, too. 194 00:08:21,918 --> 00:08:23,044 I'll give it to you. 195 00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:27,298 But can I keep the locket? It has a picture of my grandparents. 196 00:08:27,381 --> 00:08:29,842 My grandparents now. Get out of here. 197 00:08:32,094 --> 00:08:33,721 Now, back to you, Dixon. 198 00:08:33,804 --> 00:08:35,848 Give me that chain before I take it off. 199 00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:37,683 - It's my dad's chain. - "My dad's chain." 200 00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:39,101 Bitch, I'm your daddy! 201 00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:40,811 Now, say it with me. Who's your daddy? 202 00:08:40,895 --> 00:08:41,729 Willie Dixon! 203 00:08:41,812 --> 00:08:44,065 Man, my name ain't no Willie Dixon! 204 00:08:44,148 --> 00:08:47,151 You get one last chance to say it right. Who's your daddy? 205 00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:48,611 Keith Henderson. 206 00:08:48,694 --> 00:08:49,694 Damn right. 207 00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:51,447 Beat it. 208 00:08:52,156 --> 00:08:53,282 But that's my chain. 209 00:08:54,659 --> 00:08:55,910 That's my chain. 210 00:08:56,536 --> 00:08:58,246 That's my chain! 211 00:08:58,329 --> 00:09:01,582 That was my chain! It was my chain! 212 00:09:02,166 --> 00:09:03,626 Actually, it was my chain. 213 00:09:03,709 --> 00:09:04,752 And it was my belt, too, 214 00:09:04,835 --> 00:09:08,047 that I gave you that second ass-whooping when you got back home. 215 00:09:08,839 --> 00:09:10,925 Dang, Dad. Come on. 216 00:09:11,008 --> 00:09:12,468 That... That really sucks. 217 00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:14,845 I didn't know that you dealt with a bully. 218 00:09:14,929 --> 00:09:16,389 It was all good, Sash. 219 00:09:16,472 --> 00:09:21,060 You know, I had to deal with it, you know, for about six, seven years. 220 00:09:21,143 --> 00:09:23,271 You know, but Keith got his, you know, 221 00:09:23,354 --> 00:09:26,148 'cause he eventually grew up and he went to prison. 222 00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:29,193 That's right. He went to jail and braided a lot of hair. 223 00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,863 Mmm-hmm, they called him Greasy Knuckle. 224 00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:35,408 [Brian sighs] 225 00:09:35,491 --> 00:09:39,120 Yeah, well, I appreciate you trying to look out for me, 226 00:09:39,203 --> 00:09:40,830 but there's really nothing you can do. 227 00:09:40,913 --> 00:09:43,040 There is. We're the Dixons and we stick together. 228 00:09:43,124 --> 00:09:44,924 Just tell me, 'cause we coming to your school. 229 00:09:45,001 --> 00:09:46,085 He doesn't go to my school. 230 00:09:46,168 --> 00:09:49,005 - Okay, tell me which school he goes to. - I don't know. It's online. 231 00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:51,257 Online High School? Let's get to Online High School. 232 00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:53,301 - Just pull it up. - No, no, no! It's online! 233 00:09:54,385 --> 00:09:56,738 - What do you mean, "online"? - I mean, it's online. It's... 234 00:09:56,762 --> 00:09:59,140 You mean it's actually not a real bully? 235 00:09:59,223 --> 00:10:00,308 You young'uns! 236 00:10:00,391 --> 00:10:02,435 We had real bullies who'd come in our classroom 237 00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:03,728 and do like this, look at you. 238 00:10:03,811 --> 00:10:04,812 And you'd be like, 239 00:10:04,895 --> 00:10:07,335 "Okay, I gotta figure out a way after school how to get home." 240 00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:12,695 - You don't have a real bully? - No. You ever heard of cyberbullying? 241 00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:14,739 He's online. 242 00:10:14,822 --> 00:10:17,533 How about this? Click. He's offline. 243 00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:21,203 What? I'm not gonna log off my Instagram 'cause of one troll. 244 00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:23,664 I don't care how short or tall he is. 245 00:10:24,832 --> 00:10:26,334 Give me his Instagram handle. 246 00:10:26,417 --> 00:10:28,294 It's SashaDixonSux. 247 00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:30,671 Boy, boy, boy. 248 00:10:30,755 --> 00:10:32,107 [chuckling] Watch this. Watch me work. 249 00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:35,635 "SashaDixonSux, this is Sasha's father, 250 00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:39,639 and when I see you, I'm gonna kick your ass!" 251 00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:42,558 Mmm-hmm, take a look at that. [laughing] 252 00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:44,769 [chuckling] I think you spelled that wrong. 253 00:10:45,895 --> 00:10:49,398 [scoffs] Kiss... "Kiss your ass"? Damn autocorrect. 254 00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:51,776 - [message tone rings] - Oh, he hit back. 255 00:10:51,859 --> 00:10:54,070 Uh, "Sasha Dixon's father, 256 00:10:54,153 --> 00:10:57,156 when you kiss my ass, I hope you're not wearing that lip gloss, 257 00:10:57,239 --> 00:10:58,949 'cause I'll get boils on my butt." 258 00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:03,329 Ooh, I told you. They're good. 259 00:11:03,412 --> 00:11:06,666 "Ooh." Whose side are you on? 260 00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:08,376 Let me show you how to get this. 261 00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:10,086 [mumbling indistinctly] 262 00:11:12,421 --> 00:11:13,964 [laughing] 263 00:11:14,048 --> 00:11:15,549 That says "duck you." 264 00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:16,842 What? 265 00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:19,637 Autocorrect, suck my duck! 266 00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:30,189 - Ooh. - Ta-da! 267 00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:34,860 - This ain't Pappadeaux's. - No, this is better than Pappadeaux's. 268 00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:36,320 It's more like "Pops at the door." 269 00:11:37,738 --> 00:11:39,657 Johnny, why are we at my house? 270 00:11:39,740 --> 00:11:42,660 You said to stop asking you out on dates, 271 00:11:42,743 --> 00:11:44,745 so I decided to ask you in on a date. 272 00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:47,707 [Willie] Bonjour, monsieur. 273 00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:51,001 Now look, we don't have no menu, but I memorized the specials. 274 00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:53,671 We got leftover sushi and three-day-old barbecue. 275 00:11:53,754 --> 00:11:56,799 The chef recommends the barbecue 'cause the sushi don't travel well. 276 00:11:57,508 --> 00:11:58,508 Here you go. 277 00:11:59,051 --> 00:11:59,885 What's this? 278 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:03,472 That's the check. The bill is due before you chew. 279 00:12:05,683 --> 00:12:08,519 I said I'd pay you to have this catered with fine dining, 280 00:12:08,602 --> 00:12:09,602 not your leftovers. 281 00:12:09,645 --> 00:12:12,982 Our leftovers come from a very fine establishment. 282 00:12:13,065 --> 00:12:15,109 [in French accent] Le Crack-el Barr-el. 283 00:12:16,235 --> 00:12:17,987 Does the barbecue come with baked beans? 284 00:12:18,070 --> 00:12:19,131 [speaking normally] It did. 285 00:12:19,155 --> 00:12:22,199 I'll bring your things when the microwave dings. 286 00:12:29,957 --> 00:12:32,835 Isn't this nice? It's our first official date. 287 00:12:32,918 --> 00:12:34,170 This is not a date. 288 00:12:34,253 --> 00:12:37,131 Hey, if it's not a date, why is there someone here selling flowers? 289 00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:39,341 That's just Manny. 290 00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:40,676 No, that's not Manny! 291 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:43,387 He's Manuel, the flower salesman. 292 00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:46,348 - Buenas noches. Good evening. - [Chelsea scoffs] 293 00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:49,018 - Some flowers for the madam? - Gracias, señor. 294 00:12:49,101 --> 00:12:51,896 - We'll take all the flowers you have. - Sí, cómo no. 295 00:12:55,065 --> 00:12:57,234 "RIP Gladys"? Who the hell is that? 296 00:12:57,318 --> 00:12:59,528 [voice breaking] That's my third-grade teacher. 297 00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:02,490 And we thank her for bringing us together in death. 298 00:13:03,991 --> 00:13:05,034 That will be $75. 299 00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:08,788 Seventy-five dollars? You just stole them off her gravesite! 300 00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:10,998 No, hand-picked them off her gravesite. 301 00:13:16,545 --> 00:13:20,382 Thank you. Uh, might I interest you in a casket? 302 00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:21,592 Why would we want a casket? 303 00:13:21,675 --> 00:13:24,595 Oh, I don't know. It seems like this relationship is dying. 304 00:13:25,513 --> 00:13:27,640 - This isn't a relationship. - Yet! 305 00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:29,099 [microwave dings] 306 00:13:36,857 --> 00:13:38,108 We didn't order sushi. 307 00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:39,652 Barbecue's gone. 308 00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:43,739 - We'd like some wine. - So would I. 309 00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:46,075 Let me know if y'all gonna make a liquor store run. 310 00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:49,537 Ooh! [laughing] 311 00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:51,288 Marcus is so crazy. 312 00:13:52,039 --> 00:13:55,709 [mock chuckling] Who is Marcus? And why is he so crazy? 313 00:13:55,793 --> 00:13:58,087 He's my little trainer friend. 314 00:13:58,170 --> 00:14:01,298 But he gonna take me to the real Pappadeaux's tomorrow night. 315 00:14:01,382 --> 00:14:03,843 That doesn't sound like a very responsible trainer. 316 00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:06,971 Don't worry. He gonna work me out. [chuckles] 317 00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:13,561 Hey, I got half a Kit Kat bar if y'all want dessert. 318 00:14:14,186 --> 00:14:15,896 Speak now or forever lose this piece. 319 00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:18,941 All right. 320 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:27,074 That's my chain! Give me my chain! Keith, that's my chain! 321 00:14:27,157 --> 00:14:29,618 Give me! My neck is... My neck is naked. 322 00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:32,997 My neck is naked. Keith! Keith! 323 00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:34,999 Give it! Give it back! 324 00:14:35,082 --> 00:14:38,085 - Dad! Dad, are you okay? - Hey! Yeah. Mmm-hmm. 325 00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:39,545 Mmm-hmm. 326 00:14:39,628 --> 00:14:41,130 What, did you sleep down here? 327 00:14:41,213 --> 00:14:44,884 Yeah, I did. I was up all night, hmm? 328 00:14:44,967 --> 00:14:47,428 - Working on your troll. [chuckles] - My troll? 329 00:14:47,511 --> 00:14:50,222 You know, I ate a whole damn box of Troll House Cookies. 330 00:14:51,181 --> 00:14:55,519 Anyway, the great philosopher Sun Tzu says, 331 00:14:55,603 --> 00:15:00,649 [in accent] "In order to fight the troll, you must become the troll." 332 00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:04,737 Why are you talking like Nelson Mandela? 333 00:15:04,820 --> 00:15:06,071 [in accent] I don't know. 334 00:15:07,364 --> 00:15:09,283 Anyways, my troll is gone. 335 00:15:09,366 --> 00:15:11,201 He probably found someone else to pick on. 336 00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:13,621 Or he found the unemployment line, 337 00:15:13,704 --> 00:15:15,998 'cause I got him fired from Papa John's. 338 00:15:16,582 --> 00:15:17,582 Sorry, Shaq. 339 00:15:21,003 --> 00:15:23,356 - Thanks for looking out for me, Dad. - Hey, that's what dads do. 340 00:15:23,380 --> 00:15:26,884 But just so you know, the troll might be coming after you next. 341 00:15:26,967 --> 00:15:30,888 Ha-ha! Look at that. See this? I'm a thumb thug now. 342 00:15:30,971 --> 00:15:32,222 Yay-yay! 343 00:15:35,684 --> 00:15:36,684 What's up, guys? 344 00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:38,896 I'll leave you guys to yourselves. 345 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,500 Is your sister here? [chuckles nervously] 346 00:15:42,524 --> 00:15:44,360 Our date last night ended a little weird. 347 00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:45,861 But she didn't mean what she said. 348 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:47,321 Whatever she said, she meant. 349 00:15:47,404 --> 00:15:49,531 Yeah, she said that, too. But she didn't mean it. 350 00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:52,159 Oh. I'm so sorry about Zia and everything like that. 351 00:15:52,242 --> 00:15:53,494 But think about this. 352 00:15:53,577 --> 00:15:57,331 You don't have to worry about her kissing any boys for a long time, hmm? 353 00:15:58,165 --> 00:16:00,668 We just gotta work the kinks out, though, in that formula. 354 00:16:00,751 --> 00:16:03,462 Oh, it's probably nothing. Zia's allergic to everything. 355 00:16:03,545 --> 00:16:05,381 Yeah, we don't even use detergent anymore. 356 00:16:05,464 --> 00:16:07,800 [gasps] So what are you saying? 357 00:16:07,883 --> 00:16:10,862 [hesitating] You saying that the lip gloss actually didn't blow her lips up? 358 00:16:10,886 --> 00:16:13,389 Probably not. I think you're good. 359 00:16:13,472 --> 00:16:15,683 I gotta go apologize to Gunther. 360 00:16:15,766 --> 00:16:17,101 Yeah, over in Germany. 361 00:16:17,184 --> 00:16:18,727 What time is it in Düsseldorf? 362 00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,187 I... 363 00:16:20,270 --> 00:16:24,108 [Chelsea] Damn! Oh, that's deep. Go deeper, go deeper! 364 00:16:24,191 --> 00:16:25,818 [Marcus] Yeah. Feels good, doesn't it? 365 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:31,198 Yeah, we'll open up your hip flexors even more later, all right? 366 00:16:31,281 --> 00:16:32,282 Yeah. 367 00:16:32,366 --> 00:16:33,951 Babe! What the hell's going on? 368 00:16:34,034 --> 00:16:36,662 Hey, hey! Get away from my girlfriend! 369 00:16:36,745 --> 00:16:38,664 I am not your girlfriend! 370 00:16:38,747 --> 00:16:41,500 This is my trainer, Marcus. 371 00:16:41,583 --> 00:16:43,127 - What up, bro? - [sighs] 372 00:16:43,210 --> 00:16:44,420 And it's just a workout. 373 00:16:44,503 --> 00:16:47,798 Well, this workout ain't working out. 374 00:16:47,881 --> 00:16:49,508 Give me a second. 375 00:16:49,591 --> 00:16:51,093 You know what, Johnny? You're right. 376 00:16:51,176 --> 00:16:53,679 This ain't working out. We're over. 377 00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:56,514 Uh... 378 00:16:59,226 --> 00:17:01,020 You look a little tense, bro. 379 00:17:01,103 --> 00:17:02,730 Let me rub on those shoulders. 380 00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:07,627 - [Brian] I'm good, Pop, hold it straight! - I am! 381 00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:09,570 Trying to put this fire out. No pun intended. 382 00:17:09,653 --> 00:17:11,071 I don't want #Baysucks trending, 383 00:17:11,155 --> 00:17:13,699 and I don't want no shaky-ass Worldstar video, either. 384 00:17:13,782 --> 00:17:15,093 Ain't nothing wrong with Worldstar. 385 00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:17,036 I directed some of their greatest videos. 386 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:19,872 You ever seen "The Fish That Saved Palmdale"? 387 00:17:19,955 --> 00:17:21,832 - And we're live! - [stumbling] Uh... 388 00:17:21,915 --> 00:17:24,084 Pops, I thought you was gonna give me an "action." 389 00:17:24,168 --> 00:17:26,545 Oh, stop complaining, boy, and put on your lipstick. 390 00:17:26,628 --> 00:17:27,628 Action! 391 00:17:28,088 --> 00:17:29,840 Hey. What's up? It's, uh, Brian Dixon. 392 00:17:29,923 --> 00:17:31,759 I'm the head honcho here at Bay Cosmetics. 393 00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:34,678 There was a viral video going around with a girl whose lips exploded 394 00:17:34,762 --> 00:17:36,388 because of our lip stock... Gloss. 395 00:17:36,472 --> 00:17:37,681 But I want to tell you this. 396 00:17:37,765 --> 00:17:39,892 It wasn't our fault. It was her father's genetics. 397 00:17:39,975 --> 00:17:41,852 That's why you can't have white friends. 398 00:17:43,353 --> 00:17:48,317 So I am here to put my lips and my lip gloss on the line 399 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,486 live on IG. [chuckling] 400 00:17:50,986 --> 00:17:52,821 All right, here we go. Uh... [exclaims] 401 00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:54,573 Kind of spicy. [chuckles] 402 00:17:55,616 --> 00:17:56,950 [clicks tongue] Oh... Uh... 403 00:17:57,034 --> 00:17:58,035 Yeah... Uh... 404 00:17:58,118 --> 00:18:00,204 Put your lipstick on, boy! What, you scared? 405 00:18:00,287 --> 00:18:02,057 [whispering] I ain't scared! I ain't scared of nothing! 406 00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:04,208 I always Harlem Shake when I'm putting on lipstick. 407 00:18:04,291 --> 00:18:05,531 [speaking normally] Uh, so, uh... 408 00:18:06,418 --> 00:18:07,628 Okay, here we go. 409 00:18:07,711 --> 00:18:08,545 [shivers] 410 00:18:08,629 --> 00:18:09,629 Okay, yeah. 411 00:18:10,130 --> 00:18:11,673 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 412 00:18:11,757 --> 00:18:13,383 Apply evenly. Look. 413 00:18:13,467 --> 00:18:16,303 Evenly. Apply evenly. [chuckles] 414 00:18:16,386 --> 00:18:19,056 I never thought I'd say this to my son, 415 00:18:19,139 --> 00:18:21,391 but your lip gloss is popping! 416 00:18:22,392 --> 00:18:25,896 We good. And, uh... Yeah, I feel great. Uh... 417 00:18:25,979 --> 00:18:26,979 Feels like a... 418 00:18:27,815 --> 00:18:28,815 Yeah. 419 00:18:29,608 --> 00:18:33,237 Feels like a flock of butterflies on my lips. 420 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:34,571 Who cooking bacon? 421 00:18:35,239 --> 00:18:37,407 Actually, it feels like a flock of butterflies 422 00:18:37,491 --> 00:18:39,201 with razor-blade wings on my lips. 423 00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:42,005 [mumbling] It's getting kind of hot in here. 424 00:18:42,704 --> 00:18:44,915 Pops, I'm gonna need some water. 425 00:18:44,998 --> 00:18:46,542 I can't understand what you're saying. 426 00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:48,770 - Are they bleeding? - Use your lips. I can't hear you. 427 00:18:48,794 --> 00:18:51,171 - Are they bleeding? - I can't see through all the smoke. 428 00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:52,464 Pops! I need some water! 429 00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:53,841 [exclaiming] 430 00:18:57,469 --> 00:18:58,720 I gotta get out of here! 431 00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:00,097 [yells] 432 00:19:00,180 --> 00:19:01,390 [door breaks] 433 00:19:05,936 --> 00:19:07,271 I guess that's a cut. 434 00:19:08,021 --> 00:19:11,400 Damn. I knew I should have signed that boy up for track. 435 00:19:14,945 --> 00:19:15,946 [groaning] 436 00:19:18,282 --> 00:19:20,367 Hey, Pops. Honest opinion. 437 00:19:21,118 --> 00:19:23,287 - What do you think I look like? - Oh, shit! 438 00:19:25,873 --> 00:19:27,040 [Brian] Hey. 439 00:19:28,417 --> 00:19:29,793 [Willie] Oh, my God! 440 00:19:29,877 --> 00:19:32,963 Your... Your lips look like a flotation device! 441 00:19:33,046 --> 00:19:33,922 [laughing] 442 00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:35,632 - That bad? Okay. - [Sasha] Oh, my... 443 00:19:35,716 --> 00:19:37,301 Y'all ain't gonna believe this! 444 00:19:37,384 --> 00:19:39,511 Bay just hit a million followers on Instagram. 445 00:19:39,595 --> 00:19:42,514 You're literally a meme! They call you The Motherpucker. 446 00:19:43,098 --> 00:19:45,100 "Motherpucker"? What does that mean? 447 00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:49,396 It means that your video is more popular than the crying Michael Jordan meme. 448 00:19:49,479 --> 00:19:51,398 [gasps] Oh, my Jesus! 449 00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:54,401 Your mouth looks like two airbags deployed. 450 00:19:54,484 --> 00:19:57,196 Okay. Everybody's funny. Everybody's funny, huh? 451 00:19:57,279 --> 00:20:01,241 Now my son's famous for wearing lipstick, I should be crying like Michael Jordan. 452 00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:07,289 - [screams] No! No, no, no! - Oh. Oh. Oh. 453 00:20:07,873 --> 00:20:11,210 Your lips look like two hot dogs exploded in the microwave. 454 00:20:11,293 --> 00:20:13,587 - Okay. Everybody's funny. - [Stacy] Oh. 455 00:20:13,670 --> 00:20:14,796 Look, I'm gonna be fine. 456 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:18,091 All I need is some Benadryl and some Hennessy and this will go down. 457 00:20:19,301 --> 00:20:20,135 What's up? 458 00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:22,221 The manufacturer confirmed 459 00:20:22,304 --> 00:20:24,723 that they put too much niacin in the lip gloss... 460 00:20:24,806 --> 00:20:25,806 You think? 461 00:20:25,849 --> 00:20:29,269 [chuckling] ...which is what's causing the adverse reaction. 462 00:20:29,353 --> 00:20:32,272 And, um... But the good news is you broke the Internet. 463 00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:33,523 How is that good news? 464 00:20:33,607 --> 00:20:35,901 What we gonna use now, fax machines and typewriters? 465 00:20:35,984 --> 00:20:37,402 No. Brian, listen. I'm serious. 466 00:20:37,486 --> 00:20:40,739 We have never had this many pre-orders in the history of Bay. 467 00:20:40,822 --> 00:20:43,492 We can't put it out on the street, I'm telling you right now. 468 00:20:43,575 --> 00:20:45,202 They'll run through us like Metamucil. 469 00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:47,162 No. Brian, listen. 470 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:50,499 We're gonna make it street-legal first, and then we'll fill the orders. 471 00:20:50,582 --> 00:20:51,750 You're about to get paid! 472 00:20:51,833 --> 00:20:54,419 The first thing you should do is get them lips fixed. 473 00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:56,713 - Yeah. - Like, a little lip-o-suction. 474 00:20:58,757 --> 00:20:59,591 Everybody's funny. 475 00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:02,844 I ain't gotta stand for all this. I'm going in to work. 476 00:21:02,928 --> 00:21:04,322 - [Willie] Hey, I'm going with you. - [Stacy] Hey! 477 00:21:04,346 --> 00:21:06,390 We can stop off at the DQ on the way. 478 00:21:09,893 --> 00:21:10,978 Oh, damn. 479 00:21:12,396 --> 00:21:13,397 [sighs] 480 00:21:14,147 --> 00:21:16,316 Uh, Stacy, make sure you lock the door.